i'm feeling much better. i was so incredibly stressed last week that everything felt fucked up. along with my dissertation, things at school are crazy. administrators are always being pushed to enforce the lasted new trend in education. the problem is that the lastest new trend isn't the latest at all, it just alternates back and forth between two fundamentally opposite approaches every few years. so, we get used to teaching one way, then they want us to do something completely different.

as for my dissertation, i met with my professors friday and took them 28 pages of chapter 4. they were happy. i can breathe a little now, but not too much. it's gonna be pretty hectic until december 16th. i've accepted that.

i've actually had time this weekend to think and to think creatively...oh yeah, and to obsess. last night i obsessed over time travel again. the first time i obsessed over time travel was after i watched the butterfly effect. it was a weird situation though: i didn't know anything about that movie until i watched it. the week before i saw the movie i had this dream:

"i was looking at my kindergarten class photo, which is here by the way, when i was transported into that day. i called myself out of the photo and hugged my five-year-old self."

now, keep in mind, i had not seen the butterfly effect. i was dog-sitting for one of my professors a week later and he had rented that movie from netfix. so, of course, i watched it and was totally freakedthefuck out. i read all about time travel theories. since then, i've always believed there must be some way that time travel is possible. last night, i watched somewhere in time with christopeher reeves and jane seymore. yes, the acting was cheesy, but it still renewed my obsession. after the movie, i read about john titor who, back in 2000, claimed to be a time traveler from 2036. he had (and still has) a whole lot of believers. many discount him now because he claimed that a civil war would break out in the US in 2004 and that there would be no olympic games after 2004 (neither of which are correct.) it's still pretty interesting.

last night i had all kinds of dreams. one was so hilariously funny that i actually woke up laughing. that hasn't happened in so long. there's no way i could adequately explain it, but it involves a male friend of mine in a leotard with sparkles and a white painted face with lots of make-up. i wish i could have taken a picture of my mind to show. waking yourself up by laughing is really a pretty great way to wake up :).

i'm still obsessed with martha wainwright's music. it's like my life has a playlist of her songs constantly streaming in my mind. i've really tried to listen to some other stuff. lately i've been listening to the postal service. i love, love, love them. if you like them, you might also like the shins. i was actaully a shins fan before finding the postal service.

if you read all this, consider me very impressed. i hope you're having a super day! i plan to. :)